Why Priests Need Prayers

What follows is an actual letter I received in the mail today showing just how important it is that you pray for both your priests and for those who struggle with our faith.

The basic context: Jack and Jill (not their real names) were to be married at St. John's and completed their marriage preparation in a different diocese.  Last week they asked me the following questions about the ceremony: i.)  Can we write our own vows?  Or at least use our vows and the church's?; ii.)  Do we have to use Christian music?; iii.)  Can we use a unity candle?

Having asked for a Catholic wedding I responded that we needed to stick with the vows given in the ritual for weddings and the music should be from a Catholic hymnal.  The unity candle is allowed, though I typically discourage its use.  I tried to convey that Catholic weddings are sacramental, and because of this, certain elements need to be followed.  I left the ball in their court: do they really want a Catholic wedding (which they had signed up for) or their own vows/music?  I still haven't heard back from the couple, but I have learned they will not be getting married at St. John's and I got the following letter in he mail today (I quote verbatim, including quotes and underlines):

"I am writing this letter with a great deal of angst, contempt, frustration, and a few other adjectives I choose not to use.  It has come to my attention, that a young man and his future wife had attended a meeting with you regarding 'Their Marriage Plans."  They were turned down to be married in God's Church not your church, because of a few factors they wanted in their ceremony, as a great many young people want to do, and do in fact get to do.  

I am an "80" year old woman with all her senses and thinking capacity in tact and I want to relate to you exactly what I think of you.  My religious beliefs and affiliations are irrelevant where your concerned.  I could be Jewish, Baptist, Budist, Protestant, Catholic or whatever.  That is not your business.  

What is my business is when you, and its not the Catholic faith as a whole, you have the audacity to tell a young man and his intended, they can't have a few things in the ceremony.  Like their choice of music, but young people today have a "Special Song" they relate too and they want it sung or played.  They want to write their own vows, which means a lot to them, to name a few.  You say NO because its against the church law or beliefs.  Really now.  I hardly think God would condemn them and others to hell for that.  You might be doing this for 2000 years, but if we did literally in life literally [sic], we'd still be wearing sandals and walking in the sandy desert.  There are many laws the church professes to follow saying their "Church Laws" but they're not.  They're man made laws told to me by a "Priest," yes a "Priest".  I've known many priests in my 80 years and they don't strangle people by church laws.  One told me, after I asked him, if he knew someone who wasn't Catholic, if he'd refuse the sacraments to them.  He knows some like that but said he'd never refuse them as that is between them and God.  

Who appointed you, "God, Judge and Jury".  Who are you or the church to say they can't have their music and special vows.  Perhaps the church will one day be judged for their actions by God and the people.  How about the Church hiding the "Pedophile Priests" from place to place and harming minds and bodies of young boys.  Why weren't they prosecuted for their horrendous crimes.  What's worse, that or "Special Music and Vows".  

You are a pompous, arrogant, self centered, egotistical, self centered person and the church is in many ways--not God's Church, but what people like you have made it.  You don't have all the answers and the Church doesn't--only God does, and he is a loving, caring, and forgiving God.  He is not judgmental.  He rules the world.  You don't.  He makes the rules--man doesn't.  He thinks he does.  Shame on you and all the others who think they rule the world.  Shame on you all.  "Judge not, lest yea be judged."  Its God's job to judge--no one else.

The Church has many problems and its people like you who make it like that.  Why do you loose so many people--they're leaving the Church.  I feel pity for you and the church cause you don't see it.  "Martin Luther" broke away from the Church.  You wonder why.  Hmmmm?

Maybe you all should put your thinking caps on and ponder the happenings going on today.  

These beautiful people will be married inspite of you and the church and well have a wonderful blessed day and memories without you and the church."

This letter shows a few insights into ministry in our culture.  First, one should know the facts before contributing to a discussion.  Unfortunately, this woman (who I know truly loves her grandson and wants what is best for him) lacked many of them, starting with my own name.  The letter was actually addressed to "Father Kuntz" (referring to Fr. Kunst, my pastor) who had no interaction with this couple.  She was not present at our meeting and did not hear what I said or how I said it.  And as the game of telephone goes...(For the record, I never said they couldn't get married in a Catholic Church, and I certainly didn't condemn them to hell.)

Second, in heated moments like this it is important to distinguish ideas/desires from the person himself.  Without ever meeting me, she described me as "a pompous, arrogant, self centered, egotistical, self centered [she drove home this point]" person.  She doesn't know me or the work I do on a daily basis in priestly ministry.  Ironically, she told me not to judge others while all the while judging my character.

Third, the philosophy of individualism and egocentrism are dangerous.  Note it was "Their marriage plans" and "Their wedding".  Where is God?  Where is Christ's Church?  This couple wanted what they wanted.  Period.  Yet as Catholics we know it takes three to get married.  And if you sign up for any sacrament in a Catholic Church, certain rites need to be followed, just as you need to show up to the basketball court with a basketball, not a hockey puck.  As a priest witnessing a wedding, I can no more insert different vows (or add additional vows) than I could change up the consecratory prayers at Mass or the words at Baptism.

Finally, I move on from this experience with new gratitude for the couples I am honored to work with towards marriage.  Wherever they are at in the faith, I appreciate their openness to hear what the Church (and God) has to say about marriage and their willingness to take steps toward Him.  And I am reminded of just how important the prayers of the faithful are to priests--sadly there are people in the world who hate us and our Church.  May God, in His love and mercy, send such men and women abundant grace.  When we face persecution, may we forgive them as Christ does and love them as God's beloved sons and daughters even when we are not.

Three ways to encourage others: Daily Mass Homily--Wednesday, June 11th, 2014

            A few weeks ago Barnabas showed up in the daily Mass readings and I preached about how we can be encouraging.  This was based off Barnabas’ name, which means son of encouragement and a line from our first reading today: “When [Barnabas] arrived and saw the grace of God, he rejoiced and encouraged them all…”

            This morning I would suggest three ways we can be more encouraging in our daily lives.  First, be present to those around you.  One of my pet peeves is when I go to a family’s house, out to dinner or spend time with friends, only to have everyone on their cell phones.  I bug our kids at youth group by asking, “Who can you be texting when you have friends right here?!”  Simply giving a person attention is a way to encourage them.

            Second, use words of affirmation.  We all love hearing compliments yet don’t always give them ourselves.  Take time to tell someone, “Good work,” or “I appreciate you”.

            Finally, remember that you can never say thank you enough.  These two simple words convey gratitude and it is in a spirit of gratitude that encouragement is born.

            Like St. Barnabas—the son of encouragement—may we encourage our spouse, children, coworkers, friends and strangers today, especially in their walk of faith.

Catholic happiness: Daily Mass Homily--Monday, July 9th, 2014

            One tool I often use in evangelization is to appeal to the desire for happiness.  Every person wants to be happy and makes choices that they think will make them happy.

            But in our Catholic tradition we must first understand the sort of happiness we are talking about because the word happy can be used in all sorts of ways.  I may be happy when I go for a walk outside.  I am happy when the Twins win.  I will be happy when I am no longer Fr. Rich’s indentured servant.

            When we speak of happiness according to the Gospel message, we are actually referring to blessedness—a state of peace, joy and contentment that is deeper than feelings.  The Latin word used in the beginning of the Sermon on the Mount in Matthew 5 is beatus and this is why we call Jesus’ list the Beatitudes.

            Notice that Jesus’ teaching refers to something deeper than emotions: we are called blessed when we are poor in spirit, meek, merciful, peacemakers and persecuted—all of which may be lived out despite difficult human emotions.

            Trusting in God, we can live blessed lives despite negative challenges from the world, our own fallenness or evil itself.  The same God who miraculously fed Elijah with ravens offers us the grace to enter into His peace even in the midst of turmoil.

            May we live blessed lives and experience the happiness—the beatitude—that only Christ can give.

Confirmation: Pentecost Sunday (replaces 8th Sunday of Easter)

At one o’clock this afternoon a number of our students will be confirmed at the Cathedral.  As part of their preparation, the students met with Fr. Rich for a final check-in.  Fr. Rich asked if I would meet with a few students and I began by asking each of them, “Why do you want to be confirmed?”  The usual answer was something like this: “I want to be confirmed to grow closer to God.  I want to be an adult in the faith.”  I would then ask a follow up question: “If confirmation makes you an adult in the faith, why do many dioceses in our own country confirm in eighth grade, or even second grade?” 

The fact is, our placement of confirmation in high school is actually wrong theologically.  In church history the order of the sacraments of initiation was baptism, confirmation and Eucharist.  This is the same order we see at the Easter Vigil for catechumens and is still used in other Catholic rites and in Orthodox communities.  Some even baptize, confirm and give Holy Communion to infants.

Confirmation is not becoming an adult in the Church!  This mentality implies that it is a rite of passage or something we earn.  Like all the other sacraments, confirmation is not something we earn but a gift freely given.  It is a confirmation of the graces God gave us at Baptism and in particular a strengthening of the Holy Spirit’s presence in our lives.

In both the Acts of the Apostles and the Gospel of John, the disciples were locked in a room out of fear.  Yet when they received the Holy Spirit they broke open the doors and proclaimed the Good News of Jesus Christ to the world.

Often enough we can remain locked in ourselves out of fear.  We don’t want to ruffle feathers or bring up our faith out of fear of being persecuted.  I have noticed many Catholics have two fears in particular to overcome: the fear of speaking about God and the fear of going to Confession—both of which are addressed in the Scriptures today.

Please, God, may we all experience God’s love and mercy in our lives.  And when we experience the joy of the Gospel, we can’t lock this away!  We are called to share with our parents, classmates, teammates and others the Good News of Jesus.  This doesn’t take a theology degree or require having all the answers—it simply takes courage to speak about Jesus.

And we have nothing to fear in going to Confession.  Jesus tells his disciples, “Receive the Holy Spirit.  Whose sins you forgive are forgiven them, and whose sins you retain are retained.”  God has given us a concrete way to know our sins are forgiven through His sacrament of mercy.  As I’ve said before, a three to five minute talk with a priest (even if it is embarrassing or awkward) will lead to complete forgiveness and a clean slate.  I pray you experience this regularly.

When it comes to speaking the Good News or coming to Confession, trust in the Holy Spirit God has given you.  Indeed, most of us here have been baptized, confirmed and received the Eucharist.  Seek the Holy Spirit’s guidance and gift of courage!

Please pray for our confirmands on their big day.  If you are able, know you are most welcome to celebrate the joy of this glorious sacrament for our parish and local church.

St. Charles Lwanga and Companions: Daily Mass Homily--Tuesday, June 3rd, 2014

            When Fr. Albert and I were at the St. Paul Seminary there was a priest in residence from Uganda named Fr. Charles Lwanga—named after our saint today.  This man brings back great memories as he was full of joy, always laughed, expressed his gratitude by frequently saying, “Thank you,” and could eat like a horse.

            St. Charles Lwanga faced persecution and eventual martyrdom from king Mwanga in the latter part of the nineteenth century.  At first the king was tolerant of Catholicism, but an adviser convinced him that Catholics would ruin his country as they refused to worship pagan gods, would not fight and would not worship the king himself.  Mwanga added to this the solicitation of Charles and his companions for homosexual relations—which they of course rejected.

            Charles faced martyrdom by being burned at the stake.  He asked to have his hands untied and arranged the wood that was burned to kill him.  As he was dying he repeated one simply phrase, “O God.”

            Charles followed the example of men and women like St. Paul who imitated Christ by dying for the faith.  In the Acts of the Apostles Paul prepared for his journey to Jerusalem.  He stated, “What will happen to me there I do not know, except that in one city after another the Holy Spirit has been warning me that imprisonment and hardships await me.  Yet I consider life of no importance to me, if only I may finish my course and the ministry that I received from the Lord Jesus, to bear witness to the Gospel of God’s grace.”

            We, too, are called to follow Christ like St. Paul, St. Charles and his companions.  It is worth considering today—would I die for Jesus Christ and our Catholic Church’s teachings?

            St. Charles and companions, pray for us!

Confirmation: Daily Mass Homily--Monday, June 2nd, 2014

            In the Acts of the Apostles Paul clarifies the difference between the baptism of John and the baptism of Jesus: “When they heard this, they were baptized in the name of the Lord Jesus.”  The line that immediately follows describes an early example of Confirmation: “And when Paul laid his hands on them, the Holy Spirit came upon them…”

            We have a number of students who will be confirmed this Sunday.  Please pray for them!  As part of the preparation process they needed to meet with Fr. Rich and he asked me to get together with a few of them.  The first question I asked: “N, why do you want to be confirmed?”  The usual answer: “I want to be closer to God and be an adult in the Church.”  I would then reply, “But why then, do some dioceses in our country confirm junior high students or children in second grade?”  To this they had no answer.

            This idea—that being confirmed equals being an adult in the Church is very common.  But it is very wrong!  This mentality suggests that we have earned something, or at least come to maturity in the faith.  Yet Confirmation, like the other sacraments, is not something we deserve or earn.  It is a free gift from God!  This gift confirms the graces given in Baptism and allows the Holy Spirit to be present in a fuller way in one’s soul.

            Confirmation is one of the three sacraments of initiation.  The proper theological order is to receive Baptism, Confirmation and then Eucharist.  This is what happens when, at the Easter Vigil, an adult is baptized, confirmed and then receives their first Communion.  Some fellow Eastern-Rite Catholics and other Orthodox traditions do—some souls even receive these three sacraments in infancy.  Our common practice—namely confirming in high school—is actually out of theological order.  This leads in part to thinking that confirmation is parallel to graduation.

            I believe you have all been confirmed and we thank God for that grace in our lives.  Please pray for our confirmands as they prepare for Confirmation on Sunday and, if at all possible, please support them by coming to the Cathedral at 1:00 on Sunday for this festive occasion.

Feast of the Ascension (United Catholic Appeal) (Replaces 7th Sunday of Easter)

            “One of the most common complaints about the Church is that we talk too much about money,” writes Matthew Kelly in The Four Signs of a Dynamic Catholic (the book we passed out seven weeks ago.  Have you started it?  Finished it?  Please do!)  He continues: “However, I am absolutely convinced now that we don’t talk enough about money.”  (Music to a priest’s ears!)  “Money is so important to spiritual development that we need to talk about it much more than we do.  The main issue here is that we tend only to talk about money when we are asking people to give.  It is our partial treatment of the topic that rubs people the wrong way.  We need to start talking about the whole money picture: giving, earning, saving, and spending.”

            Did you know that Jesus talked about money more than any other topic?  Here are a few well-known examples: the widow’s mite (the poor woman who gave two small coins and gave more than the rest), the question about taxes in which Jesus taught, “Give to Caesar what is Caesar’s and to God what is God’s” and the parable about the talents (two used them well and one buried them, for which he was condemned). 

            Why did Jesus talk so much about money?  Kelly suggests that Jesus addressed money so often because it is so integrated into our lives.  Just think of anything you own, consume, eat, drink or maintain.  These cost money.  Plus, money can lead us closer to God or be a huge distraction that leads us further from Him.  St. Paul even goes on to claim, “…the love of money is the root of all evils.”

            We celebrate this morning a great mystery of our faith—the ascension of Jesus Christ, body and soul, back to heaven.  Having suffered, experiencing death and rising again, Jesus’ last words before returning to heaven: “Go, therefore, and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Spirit, teaching them to observe all that I commanded you.” 

            This is the mission of our Catholic Church and this mission would not be possible without your generosity (which is one of the four signs of a dynamic Catholic).  Yet the average Catholic in our country gives less than one percent of their money to charity.  At first glance, this is a sad number.  Yet Kelly maintains this is good news for the Church!  Imagine if the average Catholic gave two percent to charity.  Pastors wouldn’t be so nervous about balancing the budget (which I’ll get to start doing in six weeks).  Teachers and employees of our schools and churches could be paid a just wage comparable to secular venues.  We could assist even more families who struggle to make ends meet in supporting Catholic schools.  Our support of the hungry, homeless, thirsty and naked could only be increased.

            I love one line in particular in Kelly’s book: you can’t improve what you don’t measure.  Do you know how much you give in a year to charity?  To St. John’s/St. Joe’s?  I am not referring here to dollar amounts (I have met some very selfish poor people and very generous wealthy people), but a percentage.  Figure this out in budgeting your finances and pray about how much God is calling you to be a good steward of the gifts of your life.

            For twenty-eight years of my life I didn’t have a salary, so I still get excited for the 15^th and 30^th of each month—payday!  Throughout my time in seminary so many people were generous in supporting me and now it is cool to give back.  One way I do this is to give 2.5% of my monthly salary to St. John’s parish through an automatic withdrawal (see the bulletin for how to do this).  I love this opportunity because I don’t need to think about it and I really don’t notice the 2.5% ($60) each month.  But when this is added up in a year that’s $720!

            I am speaking today about money in light of our annual United Catholic Appeal.  You will be getting a letter in the mail asking for support and I pray you will do this generously.  Without this annual campaign we would not be able to have thirty-plus Bible studies going on at UMD or the support one of the best Newman Centers in the country (at UMD).  We would not have been able to ordain eleven men to the priesthood over a period of three years and I am one of them.  That, by the way, cost the diocese well over one million dollars.  I’ll let you be the judge if that money was well spent or not!  In short, following Jesus’ commission to teach and baptize would simply not be possible without each of us chipping in what we can to support our Church.

            Please read The Four Signs of a Dynamic Catholic to see how our generosity is intimately linked with our prayer, study and evangelization—the traits of a dynamic Catholic.  Invite God into your financial decisions: “Lord, how much should I budget for you?  Should I purchase this lawn mower?  What non-profits would you like me to support?” 

            My prayer for you this day: “May the eyes of your hearts be enlightened, that you may know what is the hope that belongs to his call what are the riches of glory in his inheritance among the holy ones…”